The Mother in law! (in general...;-))

I just read a lot of random posts where DILs (Daughetr in law) vent regarding their MIL (Mother in....... you get it right?).

& few DILs had good things to say, especially the Indians!

The joint family system? That's opressive.

The MIL? The upholder of the opressive regime.

The DIL? the opressed, supressed, cut off from her parents, sob, sigh & sob again.....

Just noting, that I'm not crazy about my MIL,
as in, I'd not put up her picture next to my favourite pop star's,
if I was still at that age.
But I would definitely keep her pics in the family album,
& not because she would disown me otherwise!

& this has been my experience:

* MILs are not mothers, dont forget that!
* Having said that, they are all, DILsare going to have for mothers, this side of earth.
* Often they'll be unfair to DILs, because it's in to be so.. maintaining status quo & all.
* More often they'll be good to DILS, because they are mothers.
* They can ask the most stunningly bitchy questions, hello! They are women :-)
* Thay can also turn around, & prefer DILs to their biological daughters! Same logic, they are women ;-)
* Some MILs are pure evil, not mine.
* Some mothers are even more evil, again not mine!

As my own MIL eloquently summed it:
"Beta, aisa nehin hai ki mujhe meri saas se problem nehin thi,
ya tumhe mujhse nehin hoga!
Par jab meri saans chali gayi, mujhe samajh mein aaya!"

I often think, the bride's mother has to give her away once.
The bride's MIL has to give her son away every day.
It's bound to be a painful gift!

Put the phone down, take a walk!

Sunday 24th jan: 2010.

This Sunday I went to the park for a walk,
& every time I go there, nature never fails to reward me.

My impatient mind wanted to pick up the phone,
& start calling someone, anyone.

I forbid myself, literally, & continued to stroll,
& suddenly when I looked up, this is what I saw:

"A red sun setting
Red & round, like the bride's ornament:
In a beautiful blue sky!

A red sun setting
Red & round, like an apple well polished:
In a beautiful blue bowl!

A red sun setting
Red & round, God's own fine print:
In a beautiful blue sky!

The kind of sunsets you'd travel miles to see..
& it was there, a free surprise gift.

All the more pretty for below it lay the ugliest building ever,
grey & dismal, all cement & cementy.

Tinged with the glow of that sunset!

Little A: Tum office mein kya ki?

24th Jan: Little A almost 3 yrs now.....
(nostalgic music please..)!

Father: Tum school mein kya ki?
Little A: Nehin batana..
Persistent father: Par tum school mein kya ki?
Little A: Tum office mein kya ki?

(More nostalgic music for the little A,
who is staying little no more :-))

Movies, magic & Me!

I love to watch movies....
Doesn't matter that I cannot remember names of characters, or dialogues by heart!
Doesn't matter to me that is :-)

& I love the magic that movies are.......

Recently I watched again two of my favourite movies:
Notting Hill
Gone with the wind

I absolutely laughed & cried through them.

I like movies that have as it's leading characters:

• Human beings, not aliens.
• Human beings who wear their clothes in the right order... inner garments first, outer garments last!
• Human beings who are emotional, & even a bit dramatic!

I live for melodrama, what bout you?

A new camera & the gifted me!

Friday Jan 15th 2010 6:00 pm when I'm leaving work:

I have worked hard through the day. I am looking forward to my weekend, & am thinking it's time I got a new camera. Yes, I broke the last one. Yes, I break electronics regularly like they were fragile glass ware. Yes, I spent a lot trying to repair it, till I realized that, that won't happen!

Sunday Jan 17th 2010 6:00 pm when I'm at the mall:

I have been gifted a new camera by the husband, & warned that if I break this too..... there won't be the next one! sigh..... where did generosity go?

Monday Jan 18th 2010 6:00 pm when I'm leaving work:

I have worked hard through the day. I am looking forward to my evening, & am thinking it's time I learn't how to use my new camera.

Why am I so gifted?

Atmosphere @ home before Little A's third birthday!

Me to Little A at all times:
"If you don't eat/sleep/put your toys away/
drink milk/shut the door/ get me my mobile (meanie me)/etc., etc.,
I'll cancel your strawberry cake & party & gifts & what ever comes to my mind!"

Little A to me even as she goes to brush her teeth at 7:00 in the cold morning:
"Mummy, strawberry cake cancel mat karna!"
(Dont cancel my strawberry cake mom.)

It's good to be mummy!

Pyaar Impossible = If the girl believes you are the programmer, she's your's to keep!

I Just watched "Pyaar impossible" - any genius can figure that!

Hey, if you are reading this, you are a genius!!

Wait, let me read it again....... Now, I too am a genius!!!


5 things about this movie experience of mine,
that I want to remember.........


1. It's a no story line movie that has "Atlas Shrugged" philosophy worked in:
"If the brain guy wont create, the marketting guy cant sell".


2. It's a no story line movie that has "The frog Prince" philosophy worked in:
"The hero is called froggy four eyes by the lead girl's daughter,
& the lead girl later claims, that the hero makes her feel like a princess".


3. It's a no story line movie that has "Disney romantic movie" philosophy worked in:
"When story line needs romance,
lead girl & lead guy, feature in typical disney melody song: '
Pyaar Impossible theme song',
where the male & female voice try to drown each other.
Reference: Disney movie Aladdin".


4. It's a no story line movie that has "Inspire the youth" philosophy worked in:
"You paint such a nice concept of:
* work (flexible timings are always available),
* work place (notice what the gals wear to work!),
&
*Work ethics
(your boss trusts you soooooo much that you can just walk onto the stage,
& say the truth, bcoz you're trust worthy?!).
So all young people immediately want to become
dedicated, ethical professionals, the perks are just too good!
I repeat: "The perks are just too good!"


5. It's a no story line movie that has "all possible" storylines in it!
I really enjpyed the movie!


Note: If any genius other than me is reading this,
no decision regarding the movie may be based on above statements!

Mail a manager, mail a friend!

What does one do, when one wants to mail a dear friend,
& so doesn't want to work on a task,
whose results need to be submitted to a manager?

Simple, one tells oneself, the applied rule is:
"I mail a manager, I mail a friend!"

(My space, my opinion:
All managers are nice, tasks are a different topic,
this is Gita at work, condemn the action......
you get the pint!**)


**Hey that was supposed to be point,but I decided not to correct the typo! Philosophy makes more sense when you get the pint, right?

The Soul of Patna - 3

Trying to recollect it all, before it gets loss in the maze of expeience that's life......

So after Golghar, we were tired & willing to rest,
but our dear friend took us on a short journey that inspired the title of this post....

We crossed the Ganges, okay lets get specific here,
we crossed the clean Ganges on a boat,
a boat with oars & a motor that sent more smoke into the air
than a 1970's truck while starting up;
& made enough sound to drown out any shriek of fear, that Imay have been indulging in.

& once we crossed over, there was nothing but sand, & then some more sand...
A little length away, some vultures & dogs,
the cool air of the river,
& looking across the river, I saw for the first time the dream that Patna was.
A settlement developing by the riverside, in a straight line!
Beautiful buildings, for across the distance you can only see the outlines & forms,
the concept & not the grime.
& I promise these words popped into my mind:
"Today, I have seen the soul of Patna"!

& it is with all this heavy stuff, going on in my mind,
that I came up with this brilliant compliment to my friend:
"It was yummy!"
But if only I could have recorded the tone...
"It was emosional attyachar" ;-0

The soul of Patna - 2

Who ever says, I dont finish things with the same energy that I begin them, sure knows me!
But who ever says, I dont finish things just because my energy level has gone down, doesn't know me at all!!

Last Thursday I was in Patna visiting relatives, living a different life.
This Thursday, I'm back to my own life.....

One reason why I totally chilled out at Patna, was because, I did not have to do any work, take any responsibilty, not even feed little A, what are elder cousins for?

So I could sit back & take the city in, as I felt it to be.
I'm going to remember the beautiful things I did..

Sat in twilight, in elder sister in law's balcony,
on the swing, surrounded by the plants & flowers that the B-I-L nurtures,
watched the night sky, vision being obscured by coconut trees,
with Little A, who not at all tuning into the poetic mind frame of the mom, kept tumbling off..
(Life is an anti-climax)!

Sat next afternoon in the same swing,
& slowly being warmed by the winter sunlight,
dozed off like a contented & sleepy me...
Only to be awakened by the husband, who really does not like to see me at ease!
Disturbs his tranquility I guess :-)
We were also getting late for another invitation.

Climbed the Golghar, an ill maintained monument, with some 200 steps,
I did not count, & I wont check google... I'm recording memories, not facts.
The Golghar had broken railings, & could do with some paint & polishing up....
& when I reached the top, I saw spread out, lot of greenery, some fine buildings,
& the horizon greener than ever, & a strange grey that artists cant capture.
I think the Golghar is the spirit of Patna, passable exterior, & something beautiful inside,
like some one had seen a dream & framed Patna, & thrown it onto the real world,
where it survived, & if one really went all the way......
one found that dream again!

I think I'll write more in next diary session.

The soul of Patna 1...

I grew up in a Bengali based household where if you did not make your bed well, or clean your shoes properly, or did any ungainly thing, you were called "Bihari bhoot"...

Bihar being synonymous for all things that untidy, unruly folks do...

The big twist in the tale came, when I married a "Bihari Bhoot"!! a citizen of Bihar.... brought up in Bihar, & still tied to his roots in Bihar!

Many a tear were shed, before families met..(I'm sure on either side, after all I was the over-smart Bangali lass, jharoing engliss....)!

And then my family paid the husband's family the greatest tribute on actual meeting: "Aap log bilkul bihari nehin hain. bahut aachhe hain.."
(I wonder what they must have felt, but it was a genuin compliment...).

All this happened a long time ago... 3.5 yrs approximately..
& this winter, Dec 09, I went to patna for my holidays...
I already mentioned that my husband is tied to his roots!

And I discovered a wonderful city.
And being the outspoken bong girl, I complimented my husband:
"Wow, Patna to bilkul Bihar's image jaisa nehin hain... bahut accha hain"
Who said I was not tied to my traditions??
I will write about the city in following diary sessions, to remeber later how the Bengali girl in me came to be the Bihari woman in me!

Little A grows witty...

Date: Jan 5th 2010.
Little girl's age: 2 yrs, 11 months.

The father puts his head on little girl's shoulders cuddling her...
Little girl: Nehin
Father: kyon?
Little girl: Main kya pillow hoon?

Talk about speaking up for yourself!!

Happy New Year... 2010!

Dear Blog,

Wishing you a happy new year!

For you are wonderful, & there are so many thoughts just waiting to be penned down,
pinned down for me to visit in the later years...

Hope this bond that has just begun, continues to grow strong & lovely...

& let the writings begin! :-)