Had the dream trip....Having the nightmarish B Ed

I really really enjoyed the trip to UK, yes it did happen, in August, for 15 days,
With Chandan and Little A, not by myself with kid, in the long run, thank God for that! Who would take Little A to McDonalds, while I went to the pub by myself, just to see what a pub is, & was rewarded for my curiosity with really bad Shepherd's pie, really, is it supposed to be that oily? Also an English bartender who gave me back 25 cents less, not knowing I count my change before pursing it... But considering I was surrounded by not a single person I knew, I decided to drop the idea of going to the consumer's forum! The weirdest thing I tried was eating was "haggis pate", sheep meat... Not advisable & not finish-able!! Being the kind to experiment, I often found myself sitting opposite a smiling Chandan, eating stuff like 'risotto' , not having the guts to throw it away for I had just refused his offer to go to an Indian takeaway with him! I did eventually do a lot of the traveling by myself, for, the better half needed to rest two days after visiting Warwick castle, and I needed two more days to cover all I wanted to see... with such opposing views on how a vacation ought to be spent, we felt assured that we were indeed ourselves, always opposing and together! I found the Lake district to be a cleaner and greener Nainitaal, wish we could keep our country as neat... Really really
wish... Our Scottish landlady was a character straight out of Dickens, complete with scarf, and rosy cheeks, and her matron like accent! Getting in touch with Subhadra and her family was special, (my school friend,) and we saw Aarakshan with them at the movie hall, more like a home heater really. The evening was a little spoilt by little A banging her lips, but God bless her, she was back in shape next morning, ready to go out with me :-) the sunny days were to die for.. the strange thing is, people are willing to help you if the sun is out, on a rainy day, they help, but the frown is firmly in place.. Weather is all important, as even little A learnt to ask every morning: aaj rainy day haIn? No? Sunny day? No? Cloudy day? No? Get the drift mummy? No? ;-) one experience I would advise for all, is a Yeoman's tour at the jewel tower... One thing I feel good about, is having taken Little A to a theatre at the Scottish Fringe festival, her first ever " Hansel and Gretel"... I had to pick between my and her theatre, due to time abundance, of course it's sarcastic, and I did the Indian mom thing by choosing to watch little A watch the play... She was so happy, and I was happier... My years of speaking to her in English had paid off... She least of all had a language problem, telling who ever would care to listen, I live in..... The address is, first sleeping line, then standing line, then again standing line....and I live in a big house.. Yeah, even she got it, space is premium in UK! I managed to do a lot, did not manage a lot more.. And cherish some moments as the recitation in Wordsworth's cottage ( from where little A collected a pebble, as I did not have cash to buy a souvenir and Chandan was resting some place from where he would not have to walk!), lines which truly captures my trip for me:
For oft when on my couch I lie...
in vacant or in Pensive mood...

Now for the BEd...keeping it. For another time:-)






For

How to feel different every ten minutes or so...

Listen to music: feel good!

Read face book status of smarter, better, luckier folks: feel depressed!

Look at work pile: feel weighed down!

Take a walk: feel high..

Enjoy too much: feel guilt...

Feel guilt too much: feel tense....

Feel tense too much: get tipsy... Feel tipsy...

Feel tipsy: feel good!

Disclaimer n Note: it is not necessary to consume alcohol to be tipsy, happiness can also promote tipsy state of mind!

Midnight rant...

Posting now that net is back...


14th July 2011:
Oh where is the net connection when you need it the most? This is 14th July, past midnight, me the insomniac wanted some net time. I'm a night bird that way, enjoying any activity the most when the world at large sleeps n I can have my own peace. Staying at home makes me practically free all day right? But I have this theory, the days are for working, the nights are for enjoying, n all the time that you find in-between: for sleeping. I manage to do a lot of the the in-between sleep thing when my mind shuts down, or refuses to function any further,  but till that exhaustion point is reached, n if it's night, when I can read, write, listen to music, n it is further established that none of these activities can give me anything but a severe headache, then why I must do it.. So here I'm, one am at night writing rubbish, or is the word hyperventilating?!
I cleared the DU entrance exam, but cannot take admission, as the subject I chose while filling the form was not the one I was eligible to take, n did not hence choose subjects I would have been eligible for........ Clearly I loved not wisely but too well.... I don't know wether to be sad, or accept it with a pinch of salt n move on... Move on I have to, but the exact style is what I'm still making my heart up about. Am trying to think there us some good in this, maybe I'll figure it out at some point, for now, I did cry at this, but only once, n that may have been largely due to hunger n exhaustion... However flippantly I put it, my heart has been a little bruised, however tragically I put it, my heart is not really truly bruised... Told ya I'm still making up my mind how to deal with this...... An afterthought: when ever something has not worked for me in this life, in the long run? That has bee the best possible solution for me. God keep n bless, n let faith heal what style cannot :-)

The Piper

The Piper...

Reading 'Rilla of Ingleside' for the nth time, actually fourth or fifth time, but the nth time bit sounds good to me.. 
What is it about war that turns ordinary tales classic, 
n what poignant poem did Walter write from the trenches, titled 'The Piper'?

                                         The Piper.
When man turns against man
Against child n woman too,
When prophecies of blood
Graduate to being true,
When we call it war
And holy terrorism..
And beauty is lost
Look to the sky or prism.
Then does the piper pipe
To the heart in you?
To take up the cause
Of tunes that hold true..
For a strife free valley called Kashmir
Or a  green green zone on the hills
The piper's piping yet..
And forever will!

To college, to foolish thoughts n wise dreams!

8th July 2011:
Got loads to do, lovely weather here, bunk it, have chicken, chill! 
Surely God is taking care n I mean to rest....:-) 

Got admission in Amity Saket for B.Ed. Degree, under I.P. University yesterday,
totally time taking n money consuming process it was too,
gone are the days when one could study for 300 INR a month
:-(
Why the sad face?
Well since I'm all big now, paying for my own education n feeling it too..

n to think I had laughed at the idea of doing B.Ed.when my father had suggested!
Truly, not once have I laughed superiorly in this life, 
when that laughter has not come back to laugh at me...
But cheering up, I'm going back to college...
To foolish thoughts n wise dreams :-)

The daughter who does not eat...

What do you do when your daughter takes one hour to eat each meal?
When she just won't have food readily,
Won't drink water without being asked to?
What do you do when you are hoarse from trying to tell her,
That food is not optional,
Hoarse from telling it nicely n definitely not nicely,
N every day because you do know as a mother that food is not optional!
You find that you still go on loving your daughter"......
Ironically I don't know if that's the boon or the bane of being ma,
Does any mom?

CRAVINGS!

To crave for chocolate n get salad 
To Know not for sure the good from bad,
To crave for the skies n get the nest
To be told it's all for the best!
To want to be secure when you are free 
To want to fly n be free no more
To be tied to realities real...
To relentlessly try to soar
To be full n feel anxiety
To have nothing n anticipate
Which one, oh which one you'll pick..
Which desire will you satiate?